Posts

Showing posts from 2012

There is much jackassery afoot in the CEA!

There are certain laws of life we must always adhere to, and one of the most important is there will always be some jackass somewhere doing some kind of jackassery stuff, just to let the rest of the world know that jackasses exist. Exhibit A is Michael Petricone, the senior vice president of government and regulatory affairs at the Consumer Electronics Association.  Up until now, I figured the senior VP of the Consumer Electronics Association just went to state funerals for iPhones that mistakenly get dropped in toilets, but it appears he has an additional duty that requires the finest level of jackasseryness. Just in time to make sure public perception of dead people doesn’t somehow affect holiday Christmas sales, Mike released a statement that disagrees with the National Transportation Safety Board and basically says it’s OK to drive and use a cell phone or other electronic device while driving, and these wonderful technologies actually make it safer to drive. Appar

The image is horrifying so we should never forget

Image
This is the picture. It's the one I see in my mind when I really don’t want to, the one that will always be there and never go away. It’s the car the driver drove, while talking on her cell phone, that hit my son, who was pedaling his bicycle home from work, that amputated his leg and killed him. His name is Devin. I’m not really sure how long he lived after he was hit, as the driver kept driving with him on the car for 800 feet and didn’t stop for three-quarters of a mile, and didn’t call 911 until … when?  According to her police statement, she was on the phone. Her phone records show there were three calls to or from her boyfriend at 12:34 a.m., 12:35 a.m. and 12:45 a.m. She told police the crash happened shortly after the first phone call. She said she heard someone say, “Hello,” then she closed her eyes for a long blink and heard a bang. If the crash happened shortly after the first phone call, that means it happened after 12:34 a.m. but before 12:35 a.

Dear God, people, hang up your damn phones and save a life!

Image
Thirteen months and 23 days after my son was killed, I sat across the table from a GEICO employee who wanted to hear about Devin. I didn't plan to cry. But I didn't plan on my son getting killed by a driver on a cell phone on Aug. 7, 2011, while riding his bicycle home from work, either. We already lived through months of agonizing preparation for a criminal trial on negligent homicide, only to see the D.A. drop the charges and instead issue a ticket for inattentive driving. The 18-year-old driver paid a fine of $100. But now -- finally -- it seemed, GEICO wanted to do the right thing. This isn't about money for us. It's never been about money. It's certainly not about hitting the one-armed bandit jackpot. It was simply about the principle of respecting human life, and paying what they were accountable to pay, so we could find a way to honor Devin and use that money to save other lives. It was just so someone on the other side of this would say, "Yes, human

Hairspray, cholesterol and terrorism

Extra underwear because my mother always told me to pack more than I need? Check. Cholesterol medication in case I accidentally ingest chicken fried steak for breakfast instead of oatmeal every day? Check. Hairspray and shaving cream? Check ... but not in my carry on luggage. I'm a pretty good traveler, so I felt pretty stupid when going on vacation last year that I was "that" guy. You know, the one stopped by border patrol agents between the gift shops and the airline gates. Apparently, the x-rays of my carry on luggage alerted agents to my toiletries, and they were having none of that on this particular flight. I was given the option of going back to check-in, to send my Edge shaving cream and hairspray through with that luggage, or throwing it away. I threw it away. While I am sure this is shocking to some of you, it is true I sometimes use hairspray to keep my honey-blond locks in place. But it's also shocking to me that I still can't bring thi

Filling my desk with minty fresh goodness

Image
For reasons totally unbeknownst to me, I have two tubes of toothpaste in my top desk drawer. One I could understand and easily explain. Two? That seems a bit excessive. One is your basic Colgate and promises "Cavity protection," and, "Great, Regular Flavor." The other is Colgate Total with mint stripe and promises to PREVENT cavities. That's a pretty bold statement. It's like the Navy SEALS of tooth defense, while the regular stuff is like Mall Cop Protection. Not only that, but the Total stuff also prevents plaque and gingivitis, not to be confused with Newt Gingrich. Though, now that I think about it, I'd pay extra for a toothpaste that prevents Newt Gingrich. While we're on the topic, plaque prevention shouldn't be confused with, you know, plaque prevention. Back in my Air Force days you could always tell the high-speed, super troops by their collection of "I Love Me" awards on the wall, as opposed to those who were never g