Meanderings and Musings of a Cluttered Mind

Always knew “Jesus Saves,” but didn’t know “Juicy Loves.” Hell, I don’t even know who Juicy is. I saw a girl walking out of work the other day with a big, black handbag and the phrase scrawled on the side.  I’d have asked, but I’m normally too shy. Besides, it was a big bag. No telling how much mace and brass knuckles she had inside. Confuse me for a stalker once, shame on you … The purse reminded me of all those Asian kids in – you know, Asia (hence the Asian kids) – wearing T-shirts with English phrases that made no sense. They’d say things like, “My eraser dazzles peace fascinating.” This wouldn’t be complete without some photos to prove my point. I suppose we could just Bing it, but honestly, does anyone do that? That just sounds like another goofy phrase that doesn’t make sense. These were Googled. Suppose we can’t blame the Japanese and Korean kids for not knowing their English. For a couple years I walked around with a custom-made jacket from Korea and thought it ...

"So, ya' wanna go deer huntin' after I fill that cavity?" "So, ya' like to deer hunt? Would you like to go deer hunting sometime?" I've had plenty of dentists tell me to spit (get your minds out of the gutter!), and plenty of dentists yell for not flossing enough, but never been asked to go kill a deer ... until I moved to Wisconsin. Eleven years later, I still remember that's the way Dr. Pete Janovic introduced himself to me. It was even funnier back then because I thought everybody in Wisconsin -- and especially Doctor Pete -- had an accent somewhere between the Swedish Chef and a bad Sarah Palin impersonation. I didn't know who Sarah Palin was 11 years ago, mind you, but once I heard her say, "You betcha," I said to myself, "Oh! So that's how Petey and everybody else sounds!" I'm also aware after more than a decade in Wisconsin, I sometimes sound like that myself, ya know! You betcha. Pete became our...